Family Connections: Note to parents at report card time:

What If Johnny Gets a Bad Grade?

All children respond differently to parental initiatives so this advice is to be considered in a general way.  

Make it the Child’s Responsibility

Ask your child what he is going to do about the grade.  Support your child, but make it his responsibility to make a change.  That way he can take credit for the improvement.

Don’t Punish

Generally punishing is ineffective.  Unless your child has been misleading you, it will be more effective to offer praise for the gains, explain your expectations, and make a plan for next trimester.

Pick Out Accomplishable Goals

Image used by permission of Microsoft Office

If your daughter says she will bring up all her grades, it’s less likely to happen than if she just picks out one area.  After she sees success in that one area, she will know that she can do it for any other area.  You want to build confidence.

Be Careful About Using Rewards

The most effective motivation to try hard in school comes from inside your child.  He does well because he wants to, and he knows you expect that out of him.  If you reward him for something he already likes to do, it can actually reduce his internal motivation.  A reward can be a way to supply motivation if your child lacks confidence or a history of success.  Use sparingly.

Celebrate Successes As A Family

This is especially important if one sibling is more academically successful than another.  To reduce jealousy you point out that it makes the whole family stronger when a child is successful academically.  All siblings have had a part in building another siblings success.  The whole family gets an ice cream cone, not just the scholar.

Contact The Teacher

If you, as a parent, are not happy with a grade your child received, contact the teacher – or ask your child to clarify.  Grades are not necessarily set in stone and teachers make mistakes.